What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Randomize
