I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I woke up under a house in Key West
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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