I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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