If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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