I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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