if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
