thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
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