my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
