She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
