so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
