she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
