you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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