I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
