why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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