awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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