Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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