Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
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