He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
