yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
