you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
