Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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