god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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