Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
