she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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