Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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