At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
