There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
