That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
So much Jack, so little girl.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
