He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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