She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
