Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
