He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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