Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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