ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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