Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Randomize
