I like to think it a success when the cops are called
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
