How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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