Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Randomize
