This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
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