you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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