I want to make a zoo with you.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
