Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize
