i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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