Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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