So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
