they said they heard you say put it in my butt
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
