Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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