Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
