the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Buhtt sex?
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
