You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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